Deconstructing with Della: Cultural Curiosity
February 13, 2017 |
| Photo source: Toronto Life |
I was curious when I heard Barack Obama say white people should not makes jokes about CP time. I had not heard the expression before so googled it and was shocked to find it meant coloured people's time.
The comment came up at the annual correspondents dinner. Obama joked that he was late because he was running on “CP time” something he said, “stands for jokes white people should not make.” New York Mayor de Blasio and Hillary Clinton were criticized earlier that month after the two were onstage together and de Blasio joked he was late to endorse her because he was running on “CP time".
A similar topic came up when I was meeting with my colleague and associate, Jas Cheema, a diversity expert and intercultural leader. She holds a Masters degree in Intercultural and International Communication and is a sought after consultant on diversity topics. We were chatting about a wedding I attended where my husband and I were the first to arrive at the reception the day prior. My friend, of South Asian descent laughed and said, "Of course you are here on time, you are white! Brown people always arrive late."
That got us talking about how different cultures value time. As Jas noted collectivist cultures often value relationships where individualistic cultures value time. Collectivist cultures which tend to be in Asia, Central America, South America and Africa emphasize the needs and goals of the group as a whole over the needs and wishes of each individual.
How this affects our communications and inter cultural relationships is worth deconstructing. If someone on our team comes in late because they needed to look after a family member, we need to understand that culturally their family will take precedent over the job. Obviously, this can happen with anyone but even more so in collectivist cultures. Understanding the priority given to family first will undoubtedly make people more tolerant and open the door to better communication.
We have witnessed this in our workshops where one of our groups got news of the sudden suicide death of someone close to one of the participants. Due to their collectivist nature, it became a group discussion. We held hands and cried over the loss, people offered support and we cancelled the rest of the meeting. I had a similar situation happen with an individualistic group and the situation was discussed quietly off to the side and the person left the meeting. We did not share the news in any detail. The person left under the explanation of a personal family matter. In the first scenario, the group commented on our understanding of their need to grieve and not push through with the meeting. In the second group, it was not discussed other than through a few hushed conversations.
While preparing this blog, Douglas Todd of the Vancouver Sun wrote an article about the need for cultural curiousity. The point of the article illustrates how it does not work to say we think of everyone as equals to show our cultural sensitivity. What we need to do is work to understand our differences and uniqueness. He quotes UBC social psychologist, Ara Norenzayan saying "he finds many students and others in North America make the mistake of thinking that respecting diversity means believing everyone is essentially the same. But he considers that the lazy approach. Thinking everyone is the same “is the basic definition of ethno-centricism.” It could even be racist." Later in the article he says, "Instead of being “culture blind” and pretending no differences exist, society needs to offer more Canadians a chance to experience positive contact across cultures."
A while back, I was awakened to the concept of white privilege when I proudly said to someone that I had been raised colour blind. She quickly brought to my attention that was the epitome of white privilege - I never had to think about colour.
As our globalized world gets more intertwined, I believe we need to get more and more curious. The current U.S. travel ban illustrates the fear mongering prevelent today. What do those who support the ban know about the countries, religions and people they want to keep out? Not a lot, I expect. Perhaps next time you are interacting with someone of a different faith, culture or perspective you can find an opportunity to get curious.
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