Dining with Della: Elizabeth Goldenshtein at Belgard Kitchen
January 25, 2016
She studies situations to learn from them and add to her own skill set. I am always impressed with her ability to observe, analyze then put her learning into action. Heck, when she realized Vancouver was not a big enough pond for her, she plotted her next move and was off to Toronto in a flash.
We met up at Belgard Kitchen, a cool spot in Railtown. Nestled in with the hipster design companies, this restaurant boasts a huge fireplace, perfect for a winter rendezvous.
What worked...
What one bit of communication impacted your life?
My father gave me advice some eight years ago, in the context of helping me resolve some problems and questions in my personal life. The issues were causing some anxiety and I was trying to figure out my next steps. His advice was "you have to know yourself" or a version of that sentiment. Understanding and knowing for certain what you need and what you could leave will get you through anything. Clarity about yourself will set you free. There is danger when you are unclear as people will take you down a road that is theirs or you might make a decision out of fear.
It reminds me of the scene in Alice in Wonderland when Alice comes across the Cheshire Cat at a fork in the road. Alice asks the Cat which road she should take, the Cat responds by asking where she wants to go. When she says she does not know, the Cat replies, then, it does not matter which road you take.
It reminds me of the scene in Alice in Wonderland when Alice comes across the Cheshire Cat at a fork in the road. Alice asks the Cat which road she should take, the Cat responds by asking where she wants to go. When she says she does not know, the Cat replies, then, it does not matter which road you take.
What did not work...
a) What great idea did you never communicate to anyone?
Plenty of times I would not voice my ideas. This is an example. It was early 2000 and I was working at a Public Relations Agency. Our technology client had just released a consumer product - VoIP, a new telephone product. Struggling with how to describe something quite technical I thought we could draw it out in pictorial format aka an Infographic. The visual would supplement the news release. Never spoke up and now see Infographics everywhere. We ended up doing a complex three page news release.
Note from Della: Ever humble, Elizabeth wanted to make sure I did not make it sound like she invented the concept of an Infographic. She thought the idea probably came from something she saw online. I think she is just plain smart.
b) What is the one idea you tried to communicate but it flopped?
My flop came early in career. In my first communications job, which was a six month contract with a small arts council, part of my work included promoting summertime events in that city. Their flagship summer festival was a family event. My idea to entice a younger crowd was to hire a grunge band. Remember this was the 90's and grunge music was hugely popular. Younger people were not coming for accordions. It was not a bad idea but what I did not do was follow through on execution. I did not have a role in the hiring of the band, only the promotion. No due diligence on my part. We ended up with a jazz funk band, highly offended at being called grunge, and a bunch of unhappy grunge lovers. Of course, this resulted in a lot of tomfoolery on the grounds that evening. Flop is an understatement. I learned it was not enough to have a good idea. I learned the importance of managing ideas, having good strategies and tactics.
I am glad it happened so early in my career. An ouch that still lingers.
c) What moment did you not say what you wished and should have said?
I was two weeks into a PR agency job and was told I would be going to a new business pitch. I was to shadow someone so I could get up to speed. The pitch was with the president and a long term employee. My role was not that defined. The woman who was the lead got hit with a lot of questions and was obviously struggling. At the time, I felt I could offer something but did not. There was a long silence. I held back on saying something, worrying she would look bad. Ironically, it might have helped and would have made me look good. I should have said something - we were part of a team. Thinking back I may not have said anything earth shattering but would have stalled things and given her time to regroup. I regret not having the confidence to speak up.
What if...
What advice would you give to your younger self to enhance your ability to communicate with others – and why?
There are three things.
In life, there is a time and place to articulate a story. There are many different formats from long form to a joke. In the professional realm, it is critical to get to the point and get to it quickly. Formal presentations, management meetings and with clients - I am still learning how to communicate in the most concise way.
Do not overestimate or underestimate the importance of preparing. You will get to the point quickly if you prepare. Your preparation can be proportional to the meeting - even a casual weekly meeting needs prep. Identify your main point and get there quickly. State your thesis right away, have some supporting points but leave people coming back to you for more.
We often default with advice about the ability to speak or present better but active listening and knowing when to not talk is just as important.
The Toronto move for Elizabeth has served her well. She has a great job, travels the world, is happily engaged and dotes on the other love of her life - their dog, Harley.
Posts
0 comments